N2P 051: The One After 50

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  • Tello starts the show off by burping into the microphone again, and Number Two Cuz is disgusted again. Tello asks the audience if they get disgusted by this behavior, and he invites people to contact him to let him know. numtwopod@gmail.com or @numtwopod on twitter and instagram.
  • Number Two Cuz is thinking of getting rid of her social media accounts, but Tello reminds her that @numtwopod needs social media attention.
  • Lourdes was in charge of writing last episode’s show notes, and she delivered them late.
  • Tello visited his mom a couple of weeks ago, and he was able to fix her ipad that she was having trouble with on episode 50.
  • Tello was surprised that his mom didn’t do any cartwheels when he fixed her ipad.
  • Tello ate too much food when he visited his mom, and watching the Netflix series “Ugly Delicious” with his mom made him eat more.
  • Lourdes shares a detox recipe with Tello to help clear out some of the garbage he ate on his visit…it’s called “suck the fat.”
  • Number Two Cuz saw The Equalizer Two. She liked it better than Sicario 2, but her husband and son disagree. Tello thinks this disagreement could tear the family apart.
  • Lourdes registered for her classes, and Tello feels like it’s going to be a boring story.
  • Lourdes will be taking Anatomy and Physiology, and Tello is glad that Number Two Cuz will finally learn what the vulva is.
  • Tello wants lourdes to film herself asking the professor what the vulva is. Tello decides to act out that scenario, and Number Two Cuz begins to question her pronunciation of the vulva.
  • Tello replaces some of the lyrics to the song “Volver, volver” with the word ‘vulva’.
  • Lourdes remembers when their aunt Gloria read a fake death announcement for Vicente Fernandez and misinformed the entire family.
  • Number Two Cuz hates when names are mispronounced.
  • Tello tries to play a theme song to introduce Lourdes’ sad story, but his iPad battery is dead.
  • Lourdes lost a friend and coworker to cancer, and she can’t believe how strong her friend was in the face of death.
  • Lourdes had a Future Dr. T moment, and shared some advice with the audience, “Don’t worry, be happy.”
  • Tello pointed out that her advice was also a popular song.
  • Tello had an extended weekend stay in downtown Austin.
  • For the first time in his life, Tello took a tour of the Texas State Capitol building.
  • Lourdes needs a new purse because her favorite one is falling apart.
  • Tello recalls a family legend that their grandfather one a bet by defecating on the steps of the Texas State Capitol.
  • Tello had a poop scare walking around downtown Austin.
  • Tello fell in love with his hotel bathrobe. He looked into buying one, but it was out of his price range.
  • Tello tweeted out how much he enjoyed the bathrobes, and the hotel responded to Tello’s tweet about the bathrobe. Unfortunately they were trying to sell him an even more expensive version of the robe.
  • Tello has been off keto for a while, but he’s trying to be disciplined.
  • Tello has been listening to motivational speeches on leadership.
  • Lourdes is reminded of a commencement speech by Admiral McRaven that was very inspiring to her and Tello. His point was to make your bed to start accomplishing things early in the morning.
  • Tello hates his mattress, and Lourdes thinks he should get a new one.
  • Tello admits that he likes some country music.
  • Lourdes interrupts the show because she had her headphones on correctly.
  • Tello thinks a woman was hitting on him at a store he frequents quite often.
  • Tello is hesitant to ask the woman on a date because he’s not sure how old he is, and he doesn’t want to have to stop going to this store because he likes shopping there.
  • Lourdes has noticed that her daughter and husband are wearing their Number Two Podcast. Tello is upset that their family is becoming more supportive now that they can’t record on a regular basis.
  • Lourdes and Tello make fun of how a secret is kept (or not kept) in their dysfunctional family.
  • Future Dr. T returns to give Tello more dating advice.
  • Tello argues with Future Dr. T about which metaphor to use to describe his hesitation in dating.

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